ReApMySoUl
Sep. 13th, 2009
10:31 pm - It's time.. time for a new me!
Almost 2 weeks ago I started a diet.. I honestly couldn't stand myself anymore and felt it was time to do something. I'm bigger than I've ever been EVER and I dont have anyone to blame but myself for that.
I remember when I started gaining weight, right after losing my only pregnancy to miscarriage, dealing with a mentally and physically abusive husband.. the only comfort that I had was food. I wasn't working at the time and I remember staring at those 4 walls day in and day out. Depressed, lonely and stressed from the recent loss of my father also. I was in my early 20's and food was my friend.
Now in my mid 40s.. I look at my face and I still see me, but when I look at the rest of myself I don't know that person. I've decided to fix that problem and I'm serious this time.
I started on the Alli (sp) program. Basically what it does is block a percentage of the fat that you consume. Well, I found out QUICK that this is a perfect behavior modification program for overeating and eating items high in fat. Just what I need! Lets put it this way.. since it's a fat blocker.. if you consume too much food or too much fat.. your gonna be perched on the throne for awhile!
Believe you me, my lifestyle is busy and thats the last place that I have time to camp out at all day. So, I just am very VERY careful about what I eat. As long as you eat right, you'll have no problems. I've stopped drinking Dr. Pepper.. I was drinking 2 cans a day.. which is way less than some people but still not good for you. Here in the south.. we love our super sweet tea.. I can say that I really do miss that but Splenda does a great job of faking it.
I realize that this is a MAJOR feat for me. I prayed and asked God to help me do it and to give me strength. Everytime that I find myself wanting to cave in I ask him to help me.. He has been a fantastic support system!
So far I've lost 5 lbs. That isn't much in 2 weeks but hey... I'll take what I can get and I'm not going to beat myself up if the lbs don't come off as fast as I'd like for them to. That's 5 down and LOTS to go. Water, Water and more WATER!
Yay ME!
Mar. 25th, 2009
09:39 pm - Stormy night
It's a very stormy night here.. the satellite has gone out, so no TV. just the sounds of the the storm along with the wind pounding on my tin roof over the patio. Hopefully the rain will help wash some of this pollen away that's covering everything and making it bright yellow.
My 16 yr old poodle passed away in Feb. I miss him so much..he made every step that I've made nearly for all these years, slept in the bed with me up until last year when he started falling off, and went thru a couple of husbands with me even! lol.. He was the most loyal man I've ever know, seriously. I had him cremated and he now sits in a beautiful brass and mother of pearl urn in my china cabinet. When the day comes that I pass away, I hope that my wishes will be honored to have him buried with me. It's what he would have wanted.
Earlier this month I was bitten by a brown recluse spider on my foot. Let me tell you, that was one painful thing! I was very careful with it, and kept it covered with a bandage containing silver something or other, and cleaned it with peroxide several times a day. I'm happy to say that I don't think I will have any permanent skin loss from it.. even though it's still sore, it seems to be healing well. I'm scared of spiders in a big way.. this is the second time that I've been bitten.
My job is going well. I have a new boss who is wonderful. My ex boss was screwing stuff up in a big way. Things are much more laid back now than what they were.. all of us seem to have a new outlook with the new boss.
I just saw new pictures of my birthmom and sisters. It's been years since I've seen her and I just sorta sat and looked at the pictures. I think I'm so different than them. .. I notice myself getting nervous and irritated when I see her pictures for some reason. Her husband has aged so much... it shocked me, but then again it's been years. Pictures of the whole family.. my birthmom, brother and 2 sisters that I have never met.. it bugs me I guess that I'll never be a part of what they have as a family. It's a strange feeling.
I'm waiting for this storm to pass so I can go to bed.. Guess I worry about sleeping thru a tornado or something, lol..
night yall!
Mar. 24th, 2009
09:19 pm - I'm still alive~
Wow.. I didn't realize that it had been 13 weeks since my last post! Mostly these days I blog on Myspace and recently discovered facebook too. I don't care for facebook that much.
My baby girl turned 11 Saturday. It seems weird. My baby. My preteen baby. We had a fantastic party for her birthday.. a Hawaiian Luau theme. We let the kids get into the hot tub, grilled burgers and hot dogs and rented one of those big hopper things. THEN, 5 of the girls spent the night. I've never seen so many dirty/wet towels in all my life! lol.. The girls stayed up all night long. I'm glad it turned out fun.. Chels said that all the kids were talking about her party Monday and how fun it was.
Newsflash!!!!
My oldest daughter has been coming around... She's came over about 4 times in the last few weeks. My guard is up big time, and she isn't the same child that I raised. I've came to the conclusion that it "is what it is" and I need to just take the good with the bad and not let her test my limits.
She has a tattoo now, and a tongue ring that she loves to show off.. She came to chels' birthday party dressed in a halter top with her entire bra sticking out of the back.. not just straps.. I was very embarrassed but what do you do? She's 24 yrs old and I didn't raise her to be like she is today. So, it is what it is.
The baby is darling. I'm trying not to get too attached to her because just as soon as I do, they'll be gone again. I know this. Her boyfriend is still the same ... he sat at the party and didn't mingle or really even speak to anyone. It's his personality or breeding or a little of both. I worry about the baby, but I really try not to think about it so I wont.
She seems happy to be around us. I'm glad.
Her boyfriend got her to ask me for 10 dollars for gas. I knew it wasn't for gas.. and I said no. It felt good. I knew if I started something like that it would only get worse. Sure enough, he went out partying that night.. but at least it wasn't on my money!
Well, it's my bedtime folks.. I just wanted to check in! Hugs!~
Dec. 19th, 2008
10:07 pm - wondering if I'm ever
gonna get done with shopping.
I still have some main gifts to get... husband, mother and aunt.. which are my biggies other than the Santa stuff.
I'm not just totally thrilled with anything that I've gotten anyone this year, and I've totally cut back, just because.
I'm having a little party for the guys at work Tuesday.. I want to make it special for them.. and I'll do my best.. but with the cost of food like it is, I hope they don't expect a big spread.. I'll do a cake, cookies and some candy.. maybe deviled eggs. One of the bosses is cooking Chili and the guys are donating $3.00 each to cover expenses for that. Some of them actually grumbled about having to pay 3 dollars.. geez.
I have a party to go to Tuesday night.. then I'll be hosting a get together here.. then another one Christmas afternoon. I've been cooking my butt of lately and freezing things. I'm not going just way overboard this year like previous years... It works me too hard and I don't have any help, not even with the cleanup. I enjoy having everyone over, but the bottom line is, I just work too much now to put on big party like I use to do. Tomorrow I need to make out my menu's and go to the grocery store. I've been good at using coupons lately for things, and stocking up on things as they come on sale. I figure with the economy in this town like it is right now, I probably need to get in practice again.
New Years Eve we'll be going to a friends for a get together.. we always have a blast and I'm excited about getting to see everyone. It's been awhile and it will be nice to just relax and enjoy.
I think I'm done with my Santa doings.. She's getting a TV, Nintendo DS games and other odds and ends. She wanted a flat screen TV, but.. ugh.. I just couldn't see that just yet!
Has anyone ever made Turtle butter candy? I made it the other night and I have to say that it's the prettiest candy that I remember seeing in a long time.. and OHHHH so easy! I broke mine apart like bark, instead of cutting into squares.. I think it's going to be a hit! I'll make another batch tomorrow to send to the police station and have for my work party. So far I've made that, caramel dipped pretzels and fudge.. which was much easier than my granny's recipe, but good none the less.. I have some cakes and cookies frozen too... thank goodness for the freezer!
I've had these small, freaky looking knots come up on the inside of my left wrist recently. They are spongy feeling and look about the size of a pea and under the skin. I keep hoping that they will go away but they haven't yet. I guess it's going to mean a trip to the doctor soon, I just hope that he doesn't say surgery... both of my jobs require extensive use of my hands.. and cannot be done if I'm in any sort of cast at all. I wish I knew what these things were.
I hope everyone has a bright and beautiful weekend before Christmas!
Nov. 27th, 2008
08:40 am
Happy Thanksgiving Ya'll!
I'm spending the day alone for the most part.. hubby had to work a 12 hr shift and the little one is at her dads for the day. We'll have our Thanksgiving dinner tonight once everyone gets home. This is the first quiet Thanksgiving that I've had in a while, years! It seems very strange.
I like to cook when I'm alone. I don't have to stop and do anything unless it's to tend to one of the furbabies or something. Usually I just leave the backdoor open and watch them playing outside.
Speaking of Furbabies... A couple of months ago we adopted a Boxer from the animal shelter nearby. He was soooo skinny, his hip bones stuck out and his ribs were showing..he weighed only 34 lbs the day that we got him, poor baby. Like everything else around here. myself included.. I can proudly say that he has some meat on his bones now and has easily gained at least 20 lb lbs. He's beautiful, shiny and spoiled rotten. He is definitely full blooded..I can't see someone just chunking him out.. but maybe they got him not realizing the high energy that they have. We named him Sam, the name just seemed to fit him. He loves to love on you and give hugs.. such a personality too!
Animals just seem to come to us for some reason.. We had a stray cat that had beautiful white kittens and we luckily were able to give them all away to a great family who took the mother too. A few days ago, we looked outside and there was yet ANOTHER stray cat lying on the blanket on the porch all snuggled up to the yard dog. This is a HUGE big male cat with long hair.. he disappears during the day, but at night he's right back in his spot next to the dog.
The downside of living in a rural area is that idiots dump their animals out here pretty often. I think the police should make a few examples out of these people that choose to do that.
This is a very bleak Thanksgiving for some people in this town this year. Our local paper mill closed down just last week.. never to reopen again. Since this has always been a Mill town and that's the main industry here.. well, the ONLY industry really.. it scares me for the town.. it scares me for even MY job on down the line. We had a local car lot go out of business here too and the huge lot is empty now.. just a product of the sad state of our economy this year. I'm thankful that we both have jobs, and even though we'll never get rich at either of them.. we both enjoy what we do and we are blessed in so many ways.
I had an old man tell me the other day that this is the time to be frugal.. to save instead of spend and to cut back when and where we can. Times are bad for this nation as far as the economy goes.
I'm cutting back on spending this year.. We'll buy for Chels of course, but the older, grown kids we won't. They all have jobs, minus my daughter whom I haven't seen in 2 yrs come April. We've spent on all of them every year and never as much got a Christmas card from them. We'll buy for our Mothers and each of us have a brother that we will buy something for, 3 teacher gifts this year and each other, and that's basically going to be it. I would love to buy for my Grand daughter, but... they wouldn't give it to her if I did.. so I'm not wasting the money, besides.. she has no clue who I even am.
Any suggestions on Teacher gifts this year? I usually do dish towels because I like to give something that they can use.. but I'd like to do something different this year, I just don't know what.
I'd better get back to cooking..
Happy Thanksgiving!
Oct. 19th, 2008
11:01 pm - The haunted plantation and our weekend trip
Chels made Allstate Choir. This is a big honor and only a few of kids are picked from each area. We spent the day in Baton Rouge yesterday. Their performance was great, with the exception of the very end when they let 2 girls pipe in with a solo part, which wasn't suppose to be a jazzy spiritual but the kids stood up there and tried to make it sound that way... Ewwwww, those few lines were seriously BAD! They could have left that part out.. people in the audience were cutting eyes at each other, wondering what the heck!
Chels did good and looked so pretty. Her looks are changing so much just this year. I have all my pics posted on myspace, if you'd like to look, please do! Also, add me if you'd like and have a page yourself. http://www.myspace.com/remembertheredhea
On the way back from Baton Rouge, We stopped at the Myrtles plantation in St. Francisville, LA. us three, my ex husband, his girlfriend and her kids stopped too. Maybe you have heard of this plantation, it's one of the most haunted places they say. If you google about the place, you'll get a history that's very interesting. Sylvia Brown has been there, and the Montel Williams show did a segment on it, along with other media people.
One of the tales of the place involves a young slave girl that got her ear chopped off.. she haunts the place and is known to take women's earrings.. just one of them. Chelsea warned me not to wear any earrings.. I did and I kid you not.. while I was walking on the grounds I felt my ears and one of my earrings was missing!! The kids just absolutely LOVED this.. and were so freaked out by it.. as was I! Chels ran in and told the lady that worked there and she said that it happens all the time, to leave my name and phone number and they would contact me when it showed up in the house somewhere. Normally, I don't believe stuff like this, but It seriously happened to me!!
I also have pictures posted on myspace that we took while there. They say that the ghostly images and things show up in the pictures.. one of my friends just emailed me and told me that there was a face in one of the pictures and a shadowy figure in a window.. and I saw it too.. if you look at the pictures you'll see the comment she left. Please if you look at the pictures and see anything, let me know or leave a comment so everyone can see it under the picture!!
Our trip there was fun. I went exploring on the grounds with the kids while everyone else seemed less interested and sat at the tables waiting on the tour. I wanted to walk around and feel the place.. and felt it I did! We walked under the trees and by an old well.. I felt a strong feeling in one spot in the yard.. so we took pictures there. The kids found some black cats wandering around which added to their excitement of the place and it being so close to Halloween too.. they were excited. I would like to go on their mystery tour at night, but I definitely would not want to spend the night there. It's a bed a breakfast too, but around $200 a night to stay.
Jul. 1st, 2008
09:34 pm - I'm still alive
Well, It's been awhile since I've posted. The month of June has seriously tried to kick me in the behind. My husband is in the process of losing his job, he was able to pick up another one though.. not nearly as good and a town away.. which means that now he'll have to use his gas instead of gas that's paid for already. No benefits, no retirement. That's a bummer, but at least he found something. Just when I think I can slow down working, seems like something like this pops up. Oh.. and I just bought a new car one week before he found out about his job. A brand new one. gotta love my timing. Needless to say, i've been stressed lately.
We had a good friend drop dead right in front of hubby and another one of their friends last week. Fine one second.. massive heart attack the next and dead. Fell out in an old Walmart parking lot and died right there. We were shook up something awful. Thank God I wasn't with them when it happened.
I mostly blog on Myspace lately.. depends on what I'm blogging about really.
I hope everyones good.. I'm catching up on ya'lls blogs right now!
May. 2nd, 2008
09:37 pm - IRS BS
I finally managed to get my injured spouse form filled out. This will allow me to stake my claim on MY part of the tax return. I've learned my lesson. From this year forward I'll file alone and grab my own deductions, including daycare and business deductions and child tax credit AND earned income credit .. screw ex wives that have no common sense, and people that fail to disclose stuff they 'd like to think has magically disappeared. I mean, you know.. you just don't *forget* about thousands!
Tomorrow is my birthday. I'll be 43. I know it's a number, but geez.. where did all the time go. Hubby decided that he was going to bake me a cake, and he's been working on it all afternoon. I thought that was really sweet of him, especially since he never cooks! Of course, he's doing a good bit of kissing up over the tax stuff still too. I was telling my boss about what happened with the taxes.. He said.. "oh wow!! I bet ya'll had a huge fight over that," My reply to him was.. " uh.. nope. *WE* didn't have anything to fight about, but *I* brought down the house!! He knew better than to say anything. I better get my freakin money!
We're in the middle of a Thunderstorm, the weather has been pretty rough this afternoon, but nothing like the damage that I saw in some places on CNN news tonight.
Apr. 27th, 2008
04:06 pm - I haven't updated in so long
I've became slack in my LJ posts. I find myself going to myspace more than here for some reason.
It's a rainy, cloudy day here today and all i've wanted to do is sleep. We did go have a very yummy, country lunch at a little hole in the wall. It was absolutely fantastic. Lots of good country cooking. I even had some fried squash and butterbeans! Yummy!!
Last night was our annual Mash Bash for the Red Cross. We had a great time, even though big parties like this aren't exactly our cup of tea. Lots of local and statewide uppidy folks were there, like always.. The tickets at the door were 70 bucks each, so you can imagine what type of crowd it was. We worked, so we didnt have to pay.
..
I'm kinda known for my weird sense of humor.. this girl sat in front of us during dinner last night. Now tell me, WTF was she thinking? When you have more butt than jeans, you should consider the folks around you!
And, I'm just dying to know what the belt was for? She had to know that her butt was exposed like this, because the wind was blowing and it was a cold wind too. You could also see dark butt hair. Not pretty!
I kept hunny in stiches by saying things like.. " I think I see a tiny piece of tissue in her crack"
Yeah :) it doesn't take much to amuse me.
Feb. 20th, 2008
02:27 pm
A very weird twist to my last post. I checked my email last night on a screen name that I rarely use only to find that my daughter had texted me pictures of the baby from her cell phone. Several of them. She asked me about my mother too. I was surprised, but at the same time not getting my hopes up. I reminded myself that she was living with an idiot, who controls her every move and action. If he told her not to send any more pictures, it would end immediately. So, I'm just playing it cool. The baby is very cute, I'll try to post a pic of her later when I get home.
Feb. 16th, 2008
07:08 am - Up and down
I was up and down all night last night with a very sick little girl. I'm almost 100% sure that it has to be the flu. She started out with aches and pains, scratchy throat. She was coughing some yesterday before daycare, but not bad and no fever. When I picked her up from daycare yesterday I could tell that she felt like crap by looking at her, plus she was quiet- very VERY unusual for her. When we got home I took her temp and it was 102. I gave her tylenol cold and decided that I'd better get up thru the night and give it to her too. About 11 her fever broke and I changed her wet clothes with her sleeping right through it. At 2 the fever was back so I doped her up again and at 6 this morning it was still at 102, she was coughing a deep rattling cough and she's very pale. /sigh.. to hell with the person that infected my baby! One weird thing, she will not let me turn her light off in her room. She normally wants it dark but now is sleeping with the light on.
Thank goodness for long weekends! I'm so sleepy, but have to work in my shop in a few. Hopefully, it wont be a busy day. Gotta do laundry and house stuff after that.. the MIL is coming to spend the night tomorrow night and Monday so she can go to the doctor Monday.
Feb. 15th, 2008
09:14 am - Snowing outside.. not really!!
The view from my office window this morning.. It looks like it's SNOWING!! Of course, it's not really, but the stuff that's falling off the tree next to me looks just like snow. The last time it really snowed here was sometime in the 1990's. The other view is a crop duster spraying the field right across the street. I don't like watching planes and I'm sure that I'll have a nightmare about this one tonight or very soon. They just make me very nervous watching them.
I had a serious bout with Mommy guilt this morning. Chels woke up coughing, not feeling well but I had to dose her up with Tylenol Cold and send her on to daycare anyway. Poor baby. They were out of school today for parent teacher meetings. I really just wanted to stay home, let her sleep late, make her some chicken and stars when she woke up and snuggle with my sick baby girl. It's a long weekend for me though, I'll be off Monday and she will too.
Jan. 29th, 2008
10:08 pm
As soon as I got to work today, got the computer turned on and Coffee cooking.. I heard a big WHAM outside my office. I looked out and could see 2 cars smashed up pretty good and on opposite sides of the 4 lane. I immediately grabbed the phone and called 911. It took the officers way too long to get there, actually.. the ambulance made it there first. I don't think that it was any real major injuries, but the car that got hit took the most damage. By the sound and the speed limit posted there.. I'm sure the girl hit the guy in the car going at least 50 MPH. I found out later that the girl was driving a rental car. I wonder if you have to pay the damage if you wreck one of those things? In this case, it's going to be pretty pricey I would assume.
The flu seems to be going around town pretty badly lately. The Stomach virus too. I'm trying to be VERY cautious about washing my hands and spraying lysol at work since we all seem to be just passing our sinus crud around from person to person. They've had some nearby schools closed because of the flu.
I'm gonna make myself go to bed early tonight.. something I rarely ever do!
Jan. 27th, 2008
12:16 pm
Oooooo after watching HGTV yesterday I saw the perfect solution to my storage problem. They did a segment where cabinets were placed in the utility room.. LOTS of cabinets.. almost like a kitchen sorta. My utility room is big.. like 12 x 20 or more, but it has LOTS of just empty, wasted space. What happens when you have empty space... you fill it up with crap you don't really need. In my UR I have.. a big chest freezer, washer, dryer, hot water heater, potato bin, extra ironing board, roll around table thing and a huge dresser, complete with a mirror and a computer desk. It sounds like a LOT because it is a lot of stuff in there. I made up my mind today that the desk, the table, the dresser and the potato bin are going going as good as GONE! That will open up that entire wall that I can do cabinets on with DOORS, giving us lots of storage for extra pots and pans, cleaning stuff, even a spot to hang coats and jackets.
I'm in the spring cleaning mode anyway..even though its cold and not even close to spring yet, last weekend it was clean out the closets and dresser.. this weekend I'm putting down new shelf paper in the kitchen.. it needs it bad.
When my house is in order, I feel like my life is in order.. I know you women out there understand this :)
Dec. 18th, 2007
09:26 pm
I know very little about some of the people on my friends list. Some people I know relatively well. I read your journals, or we have something else in common, and we chat occasionally. Some of you I hardly know at all. Perhaps you lurk, for whatever reason. But you friended me, and I thank you for your interest in my words.
But here's a thought: why not take this opportunity to tell me a little something about yourself. Any old thing at all. Just so the next time I see your name I can say: "Ah, there's so and so...they enjoy the savory aroma of monkey brains a la mode."
I'd love it if every single person who friended me would do this. Yes, even you people who I know really well. Then post this in your own journal and see what gems of knowledge appear.
So, please? Tell me something I don't know about you! Or something I do know, in Latin! :D C'mon, comment! I haven't heard from some of you in far too long.
And I'll add a twist to this -- Comments are SCREENED! That way, you can tell me whatever you want without fear that anyone else might see it!
Nov. 16th, 2007
11:10 am - Going to my dads for Thanksgiving!
If all goes as planned.. I'm headed to my Dad's for Thanksgiving for the first time ever! I'm excited to say the least :)
Sep. 24th, 2007
10:13 pm - A not so beautiful day in the Neighborhood..
I found out last night that a couple that live in our neighborhood and have lived near me almost all my life out here, were killed in a Car/Horse trailer accident Friday night. Both the husband and wife were killed.. they were in their 60's and were on their way back from their cabin in Colorado. They were killed here in Louisiana, less than 2 hours from home if the story that I got is correct. Seems as if she was driving, pulling the horse trailer and didn't judge her distance correctly when she changed lanes, causing the back end of the trailer to clip another vehicle.. and you can imagine the rest of the story with a heavy gooseneck trailer on the back of a pickup truck.
I grew up with their son.. It's so sad for both he and his sister. I use to find so much peace in sitting at my window and watching his cattle late in the evening and in the early mornings when my life was in turmoil after my ex was in a bad accident. Just sitting still and looking at their farm across the street seemed to bring balance to my world then, if even for just a little while.
When I found out about them late last night.. I just wanted to call my mama..and wished that I could.. like old times. I also wanted to hug my hubby and daughter, because it was a shocking reminder that none of us are promised tomorrow and people that we love and care about can be ripped from us in a blink of an eye.
Aug. 11th, 2007
08:02 am - Very sad day in our town, unbelievable
Details of the story are slowly unfolding, but unbelievable events happened here yesterday. Nothing like this EVER happens here.. Never in my life have I ever seen so many officers take over a town.. Check out the headlines here
www.thenewsstar.com
A very sad day here.. our town is in mourning for the officers and their families.
Jul. 14th, 2007
08:36 am - adjustments
Chels had such a hard day at daycare yesterday..she has always been at home with me.. and, since she's the new kid on the block some other kids are mean to her. One girl called her gay, one told her that her feet were dirty.. ( she had on flip flops and just returned from the playground) She was tired, so last night she wanted me to rock her while we were watching TV. I've spoiled all the kids this way when they ask me too. She got up in my lap and said.. * Momma, I know I'm 9, but I'm just sorta having a momma addiction right now and I just want to be with you* lol.. I told her that it was ok and I rocked her to sleep :)
I'm still amazed at how some people don't teach their children to be kind to everyone, especially the new kids.
Jul. 6th, 2007
03:25 pm - It's raining ...it's pouring..
The storms that were on texas are now upon us. It's raining like CRAZY!!! No complants though, we needed it. Usually this time of the year we're begging for rain, the crops are dying and everyone is having to water things. It's a welcome change to not have to drag the hose around the yard for nearly an hour every other day.
Weird, but the rain somehow brought out all sorts of folks wanting their hair done.. I still have a few people to go..
Chels is making those plastic craft pictures today. The type that you can make shapes with and then iron it covered with wax paper and they make cool animals. I forget the name of it, since this craft item she got a couple of years ago and the box has long since been gone, but if you have kids, this is a wonderful way to keep them busy for hours. We went to books a million today and she got a new book. She wants to start reading a series called phatom stallion, about horses. It's a little bit advanced for her age, but she is reading way above her level, so I didnt argue.
It's time to go brave the storm, hair awaits..
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